2000000 pics and every single one wasted!
Well, ok. Maybe that’s not strictly accurate. Knock off a few zeros possibly and that’d likely be a bit closer to the… um… “truth”, so to speak. (Can I help it if the “0” key keeps getting clogged up with fag-ash and won’t spring back?)
It was like this y’see… had to shoot off into town today to attend to a really nasty unpleasant task. Something to do with paying a bill.
Damn things. Is there no end to them? Soon as one gets sorted another rears its ugly little head. I’m getting right fed up with it all. Dunno ’bout anyone else but I don’t like bills. They really spoil the day. Make me feel all sort of miserable, and depressed, and… short of money (“monetarily challenged” maybe?).
Though I did receive my new driving license in the post as well. Heh heh. That means I’m legal once again to drive pretty much anything with wheels. Well, almost. Bound to come in real handy. Just a shame I don’t have a car. Oh well.
Anyway, on the way back I decide, on the spur of the moment sort of thing, to get off the bus at the village before mine and walk the rest of the way. (That’ll save a bit of money for the next bill as well. Which, by my reckoning, is prob’ly due to arrive in about ten minutes. Or it seems like that.)
Onward to the village then, grabbing a few pics as I go. Cos there were one or two things I wanted to try out. Inspired partly by some of mate’s b&w cloud shots and partly by something I read somewhere but can’t remember where. Don’t even know what it was now, but something to do with landscapes in black and white.
So there I was, trudging back to my village and, sure enough, getting a few pics along the way. Not as many as I’d anticipated cos things weren’t quite working out as I’d thought they would.
The views were rather less inspiring than I’d hoped. The clouds were less dramatic than I’d expected. And the sun was in the wrong bloody direction!
Then, just as I was lining up what would have been my absolute best shot of the day, some bloody stupid motorist toots his horn as he’s passing. Damn near made me jump right out me skin… just as I did the clicky business. S’pose he thought he was being clever. Hmph!
If I’d been quick enough (and thought about it) I could have snapped the registration number of his car. Then tracked him down and collared him by the scruff of his neck and… and… and… beaten him with me memory card or something.
However, things began to look up somewhat as I approached the village.
But then I hit a snag. The same snag that I’ve encountered so many times before (in my village at least) and yet, for some bizarre reason that eludes me, have completely failed to have a right old moan about.
Well, all that’s about to change!
Wires of every size and description. Call them what the hell you like. See if I care. The village is full of them. Wires in the sky. Can’t point the camera anywhere above eye level without some damn wire spoiling the shot.
And the real problem is I’ve become so accustomed to them that for the most part I don’t even see them… until I’ve taken some pics; offloaded the pics onto the infernal machine; start going through them; and realise every single one is ruined cos there’s damn wires in them!
And so it was today. After taking pics here there and everywhere I’ve managed to salvage less than a handful. And I’m not best pleased, I can tell you.
Ok, I could mess with the pics and, in the words of certain photographers, ” ’shop the wires out”. But that just ain’t my thing. I’ve not tinkered like that with pics so far and I don’t intend to start now.See footnote Cos that’s just a slippery slope that could have untold repercussions. But I have to admit its a helluva temptation.
No. The real answer is to do something about those wires. Like for example sneaking out in the middle of the night and cutting all the damn things down. Oh I could. So easily.
One slight problem with that of course. It’d probably mean I’d end up without power. And without internet. And then I couldn’t upload all those beautiful, wire-free pics I’d be taking, now could I? Or even transfer ’em to the infernal machine. Cos it wouldn’t work. Cos there’d be no power.
It’d also prob’ly mean I’d start getting visits from some really unfriendly unreasonable people like… er… electricity people and… er… telephone people. Possibly cops as well. Who just wouldn’t understand. That’s the other problem.
Oh well. It was a nice thought while it lasted.
However, there was one little unexpected bonus that sort of made it all worthwhile.
There’s this particular set of gateposts see. Opening on to a driveway that leads to a rather grand farmhouse.
And I’ve wanted those gateposts. Or rather, a pic of them. Tried numerous times, in both colour and black and white. Yet somehow I’ve never quite managed to pull it off.
But today I think I’ve cracked it! At last… a pic of them (or one of them at least) with which I’m reasonably satisfied.
Footnote: Conscience doesn’t allow me to let that sentence stand without some sort of qualification. Whilst I’m opposed to the idea of removing (or including) elements in a photo after its been taken, I will (and have) masked out or pixellated certain things in photographs such as car registration numbers, or the faces of activists engaged in some form of protest. But I regard such “modifications” as legitimate and obvious, and not intended to deceive the viewer.